BAE

I wrote this in the shower

As I was trying not to think about you

About how you make my heart beat race and my fingers tingle

The way your touch is an instant alarm

And it wakes up every hair  from the back of my neck to every inch of my arm

Your presence alone leaves me gasping like an asthmatic

Yearning for words; lost as if I wasn’t just charismatic

I used the steam to clear my head and help me breathe

Since your simple presence makes me panic  

Like a tween at a boy band concert, like a fanatic  

You bring me to a pause

You humble me ever so gently

You make me aware when I drift aimlessly

Forgetting my surroundings and drowning in routine  

You rip me back to consciousness and throw me on the scene  

Always on alert as if things can change swiftly

You sometimes bring me to my knees when you leave in frustration

Asking God for a peek at salvation

You’ve got a hold on me and it seems eternal

The way you touch every spot like you created my anatomy and know every part

The way it sometimes feels like you live in my heart

We dance this dance that I can’t stop moving to

We share this body that once was for one now two

You keep me up at night as we wrestle between sheets

Feeling your touch to the bone until I fall asleep

Silent is your voice but your grip is loud

It leaves sensations that linger...that must make you proud

This body, it’s yours to keep and I can’t let go

I call out your name and the way you hit it sometimes makes me lose control

So sudden and powerful it can make me weep

Your name on my lips like a whisper I can barely speak

Anxiety

Oh how much I wish I could let this bond go

But anxiety,

my friend and my never forgotten foe

You’ve etched your name on my forehead and called me yours

Forever at your service; forever opening your doors

I’m on a private getaway 

With anxiety - that’s my bae